What Times Are These

What's wrong with the world? I'll tell you what's wrong with the world. The iron, one of the classic Monopoly pieces, has just been replaced, through a vote on Facebook, with a cat.

What will be on the chopping board next? The boot? The top hat?

Apparently voters could choose between a cat, a robot, diamond ring, helicopter and guitar. I myself would have voted, if I had known there was a vote and been bothered to exercise my franchise, for the diamond ring. Or the helicopter. Both those seem more in keeping with the spirit of the game than a fluffy cat.

Don't even talk to me about the Scotty dog. I never played the dog. I played the iron. Or the boot or the top hat or the wheelbarrow. And you can be sure that, whenever I play Monopoly again (which, judging by my games record, won't be for years and years) I will shun that parvenu cat.